Wait! What? 4/11: Uber enters Phase One of transportation domination, Forrester writes poetry now

04:11
"Wait...what?" (Thinkstock Photos)
“Wait…what?” (Thinkstock Photos)

It’s safe to say that Heartbleed took the cake, brought home the bacon, and ate the Internet’s lunch this past week. Other stories were left with crumbs—so it’s our job to feed them to you. These articles from the tech PR world will divert your attention from the biggest online security breach ever for at least a few minutes:

Did you read any valuable articles this week, other than ones about impending cyber-doom? Let us know in the comments or on Twitter @BlancandOtus!